Why won’t you support me?

I’m sure you realize there are a million different directions that I could go with that title…

However, the issue we are discussing today is emotional support.

Why is it that the people you expect to have your back, to be your biggest cheerleader, to be ready to pop a bottle with you are often the ones who give the lackluster responses to your great news?

You think that because you are there to celebrate all of the successes in their life, big and small, that when your moment finally arrives, they will lead the charge to the celebration then… *crickets*

It reminds me of the Sex and the City episode where Carrie goes to the lady’s house for a baby shower (or party can’t remember but there was a baby involved) and someone steals her shoes.  The lady is pretty much like “sucks to be you and I hope it works out better for you” when Carrie starts to think about all of the times she was there for this acquaintance, celebrating the engagement, wedding, babies, etc.  Carrie really could not figure out how the lady could not be there for there…

How many of us have friends (and family members) who are like that?

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What do you do?

  1. Learn to celebrate yourself.  Yeah, it gets lonely sometimes but when that big moment occurs, if there’s no one around; take yourself out for a special dinner or buy yourself something special.  Don’t gloss over your WIN just because you made it to the finish line by yourself.
  2. Check your circle for squares.  There are some people in your life who don’t want to see you succeed.  They really only hang around to take and have nothing to contribute to your life.  It’s hard climbing to the top carrying dead weight.
  3. Lower your expectations of others.  Ok, that’s a hard one but think about this.  Most people operate in their own self-interest meaning they do what is best and most convenient for them.  We often receive the residuals of that – sometimes positive and sometimes negative.  You may be able to celebrate other people’s accomplishments because that’s just who you are but unfortunately, not every one is like you. So before you go snapping on someone because they didn’t act like you wanted them to act or before you say well since you didn’t… I’m not going to… Remember that we need to accept people as they are, not how we want them to be.
  4. Don’t stop being you to spite them.  Don’t fill yourself with negative energy or start hating on them and change the essence of the great person that you have become.  Some people want to see you come down off your high because they are tired of looking up at you doing your thing while they’re still struggling.  Honestly, that’s not your problem.  Don’t throw your good news in people’s face but we have to surround ourselves with people who can be there to comfort during the low moments AND high-five during the good.

No matter what… I will lift those who are down and push others even higher… I am a source of positive energy for everyone around me!

I make it a habit to help celebrate the successes of other people, even people I don’t know very well, not because I expect them to do the same for me but because I know what it feels like not to have that support.

What would you do if you were not afraid to fail?

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So often we fail to start a project, a business, a plan or to execute a great idea because of the negative self talk in our minds.  We think that we should wait until tomorrow, next week, next month or next year but that’s an illusion…

We are deceiving ourselves if we think that we have time to wait for anything.  Life is happening now.  The time you spend waiting and dreaming is the same time that other people are taking chances and getting a step closer to their destiny.

I saw a Dominos Pizza commercial last night where the CEO admitted that they have failed at some of their innovative ideas but he reminds the viewers that if they had not tried to do things differently, they would be in same place with the same product that they always had.

If you have a dream, it is ok to step out on faith (with a plan) and try to make it a reality.  You won’t succeed at everything that you try.  Some of my past failures still hurt my heart a little bit but I learned a lesson from each of them and got up to try again with a little more wisdom and some experience.  You won’t know what you can or can’t do until you try.

Bishop Richard Keith Thompson asked me in August why wasn’t I going to seminary and I honestly had no reply.  He and I both knew that continuing my theological education was something that I needed to do but in my mind, it was something that I would get around to.  And then he said, “Why not do it now?  Three or four years will pass anyway, the difference will be whether you have a degree or not…”

Just like that I was convicted… He was absolutely right… So many times we think later but later will come and what will be different?

Taking his advice, I applied to Beeson Divinity School at Samford University and was accepted into their Fall 2014 class (with a scholarship!!).  Exactly, one year from our conversation, I will be executing the idea that we discussed.  That year could have passed with me still thinking one day but instead I stepped out on faith to try to make it a reality.  Even if I had been rejected, at least I would have tried…

So, today… Examine some of the things that you say you want in life and really ask yourself, am I doing the things necessary to make my dreams a reality or am I just dreaming?  Am I waiting for a one day that will come and go yet I will be no closer than I was before?

The road to your destiny won’t be easy but it will be worth it if you are able to appreciate all of the moments you stumble and fall as much as you appreciate the moments that you are flying high toward success.

 

Recipe of the Week: Three Cheese Baked Ziti

I think most of us that like spaghetti have probably worn our family out with it because it is so easy to prepare. This Ziti recipe is a quick and easy alternative.

As a busy mompreneur, it is a great recipe to mix up, stick in the oven, check homework then put a wholesome meal on the table – all within an hour.  Boil some corn on the cob, steam some spinach and/or bake some garlic bread to complete your dinner.

Image courtesy of allrecipes.com

Image courtesy of allrecipes.com

  • One pound of ground beef/turkey
  • 16 oz medium tube-shaped pasta (ziti)
  • One jar of Prego® Marinara Italian Sauce
  • One cup of ricotta cheese
  • One cup of shredded mozzarella cheese (separate into 2 – ½ cups)
  • ¾ cup of grated Parmesan cheese (separate into ½ cup and ¼ cup)
  • garlic salt
  • ground black pepper

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  • Preheat oven to 350 degrees
  • Cook ziti according to package directions and drain
  • While ziti is cooking, brown the meat in a large skillet and drain
  • Once the ziti is finished cooking, return it to the pot with the drained ground meat
  • Stir in Italian Sauce, ricotta cheese, ½ cup of mozzarella cheese, ½ cup of Parmesan
  • cheese, garlic salt and ground pepper
  • Spray a 13×9 casserole pan with nonstick spray
  • Spoon mixture into casserole dish
  • Cover the top of the mixture with remaining mozzarella cheese and Parmesan cheese
  • Bake for 30 minutes

ENJOY!

Click here to download my FREE ecookbook – In The Kitchen With Kesha

 

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Oh, how I love @ShoeDazzle

Oh, how I love @ShoeDazzle

Every one who knows me knows that I love ShoeDazzle shoes.

I became a fan after seeing one of their commercials and wondering if I could really get such cute shoes at such a good price. I took the quiz and my inbox became consistently occupied with shoe suggestions, each one more beautiful than the next.

*fast forward two years*

There are about thirty plus pairs of shoes in my closet that have my captured my heart and the love of a few friends. Each time I ‘submit order’ I am anxiously awaiting the delivery guy’s arrival at my door to unveil the new addition to my collection. One of the best feelings for a single lady like me is coming home from a business trip to see a ShoeDazzle box waiting for me. One day I felt the need to share this sentiment with my tweople on Twitter and I guess ShoeDazzle was paying attention because they featured my tweet in one of the television commercials.

Check them out for yourself… The site is legit… The shoes are gorgeous and the service is exceptional! -> ShoeDazzle.com

Make sure you tell them @LaKeshaWomack sent you ;)

Should you commit to someone who doesn’t want a commitment?

I know that sounds crazy…

The obvious answer is, heck no!

But.. (there’s always a but when we are trying to justify doing the illogical)…

What if you are seeing someone who says they don’t want a commitment but you think they are perfect for you? Everything about them crosses off on your ideal mate list EXCEPT they don’t want to be in a relationship.

When you are together, you do the things couples do.  You don’t THINK they are seeing anyone else but of course being in an uncommitted committed relationship prevents you from actually asking.  You even speak couple language – we, us, ours…

I mean when you consider all of that you would be crazy not to try to lock this person down.  Why keep searching when you’ve found your person? Right???

WRONG!!

uncommited

One of the biggest mistakes people make in relationships is falling in love with potential.  It’s not always the potential of what a person could become professionally but the potential of a relationship.  I have seen it so many times… A person thinks if they keep doing all the right things then eventually the other person will change their mind and decide to settle down.

Now you know that I am a self-proclaimed relationship expert so don’t take my advice and go break up with your boo thang but I would encourage you to consider what I am about to say…

If you are with someone and they tell you that they don’t want to commit… Believe them!

If you want to stay with them and do all the things that a committed person does with a person who isn’t committed to you, do it without expecting them to change.

If your relationship clock is ticking and you think you need to settle down right now, go find you someone who wants to settle down now too.  I know that means leaving your comfortable good thang but if having a commitment is that important to you, why are you leaving your future in the hands of someone who obviously doesn’t want the same thing as you?

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Get Bridal Wisdom…

Get Bridal Wisdom...

Special thanks to Bridal Tribe Wisdom for having me as a guest on their show and featuring a quote from the interview in their Winter 2014 Issue. Order your copy – http://shop.bridaltribe.com/Bridal-Tribe-Winter-2014-BTMW2014W.htm and tell me what you think!

Why Me???

He seems too good to be true… Like the kind of guy that women don’t think exist any more and here we are…

Doing the things that couples do, saying the things that couples say…

I look online and see so many women longing for what I have right before me yet they don’t think he exists…

But here HE is!

Of course, I should be jumping for joy.  I should be elated that he’s here with me but…

The looming question that I want to ask is… “Why me??”

Not to sound neurotic or crazy or mildly (definitely not extremely) insane but you know how you just want to know how out of the millions of choices… How did he pick me out of all of those choices?

whyme